I'm a little better now....I get extremely nervous about things I can't plan...or prepare myself for...Akira's planning usually never involves details...and since I can't even make a real plan for going over there because I have zero clue about what I'm about to get into...I feel like I'm walking on a high rope completely blind....with friends and family telling me where to step next and Akira holding me telling me to walk. I get pretty nervous. I get worried about being replaced by a Japanese girl...or how I'll be handicapped career wise over in Japan....in fact the work part upsets me so bad that sometimes on my way to work now I'll just cry. I can't picture myself not working. It's truly one of the few things that keeps me sane is to always have a job.
I got a few emails for some of you...and let me just say...thank you soooooo much....they made me feel a lot better and were full of amazing advice <3 The thing that assures me is that everyone pretty much said similar things about my MIL ordeal and coping with Akira's corkiness. I really should be more confident in everything...and these emails really really helped me <3 Please, I'm looking for any kind of advice or anything to prepare myself for what I'm about to get involved in....and I'm pretty damn scared and it's hard for me to get excited about leaving everyone and everything I love here....even if it's just for a few years...and even that can easily be extended...There's nothing but my desire to live in the States that can bring us back.
Anyhow....I just want to say thank you to everyone out there...I didn't realize how many people were reading this....sorry about my awful grammer and spelling. I write fast and never check or edit...though I should start to do that...
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In other news....I found out what senna leaf is.....my green tea had quite the kick....
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