So we went to Vegas

We went to Vegas...and there were a lot of decent moments...but...Akira was extremely moody.

He cannot socialize to save his life, and his nervousness about it actually makes him aggressive to an embarrassing point.  But...let's start from the begining.

In the begining I started the trip wrong.  I was cranky because we were late and we actually MISSED the wedding...but I tried to shrug it off because we did make the reception...so give and take. 

That day Akira was pretty good, except he was so socially ackward that anytime he thought I was acting socially wrong (for instance I was walking behind the bride to say hi to her sister and Akira grabbed me so hard I bruised until I told him ouch, I'm going BEHIND the picture not in front of it, and he left go because heads turned)....nothing annoys me more about him in public then this move.  I understand he's doing it to guide me, but it's so annoying because...one...I can see and walk at the same time, and two, he over does it to an extreme and actually socially hinders me in the process.  Just over all annoying....so I finally just asked him what the fuck his problem was when he was in public.

I basically got no real answer other than he's so nervous about being around people that he can't enteract.  He's like that at work too, he can't break the barriers and talk to people like they are people, not Gods or robots. 

So...that's just something that I'll have to deal with...but it was a bit annoying.

Then I won a few times, enough for the winnings to pay for front row seats for the show Love (which was amazing!) and an amazing lunch the next day...so except for the room and gifts we got...the trip pretty much paid for itself.  I had a real good time and really enjoyed Vegas....

Sunday though....except for when we were eating....Akira was really moody.  In the morning he was giving me attitude because he thought we were late for check out (which we weren't because check out is late in Vegas...but you know, since he knows all why the hell should he believe me?)  on top of that....we needed toothpaste, and I kept asking him to get some at the front desk but he was too paranoid about being late for check out that he didn't even want to face the front desk.  Then he went on and on about how it took me so long to get ready (he said three hours, but it was really only two because we messed around for an hour) and how if I had to go somewhere early I would have to wake up at 4am...and on and on and on...and I was like, you know what? It doesn't usually take me two hours, we're in fucking Vegas I never to get to dress up anymore and I want to dress up so I will take the fucking extra hour and look like a fucking model thank you very much.  And...then he told me that the toothpaste was over priced and that's why he didn't get it *which is a lie* and I was like, well you can drop $200 in a slot machine but if toothpaste is $5 then forget it????

I tried really hard to have fun, and when Akira chilled the fuck out he was okay....but he seriously pissed me off a few times....making the trip lame....

And you know why he was such a bitch about the trip?  Because he wasn't in control of it and if he got a little control, he couldn't keep it because the trip wasn't about him, it was about my friends getting married...and him finally taking me on a date, which he didn't even have to pay for because I won enough to cover it...so...

Gah.

But...I will go to Vegas again...I found a few hotels that so far are decent...with decent crowds...

I really wish Akira would just relax sometimes and allow me to be the social butterfly.  His life would improve if he chilled out and let me shine once in a while.

Oh my!

I saw a guy on a motorcycle today driving in football pad gear.

He looked like an moron...but I think he's probably the smartest guy on a motorcycle around.

Stupid to have one, but at least he was smart enough to use his old gear while on it.

1,000 cranes for Mom

So...if you've been keeping up then you'll know that my mother is a fighter and survivor of a few cancers.  She defended cervixal and ovarian cancer...but is fighting bladder and skin cancer.  She was in remission until recently, and is now going through another stint of kemo.  So Akira came up with an amazing gift.  A thousand paper cranes. 

There are a few stories on this...but one of the reasons for making this long task of paper birds is a form of love...a wish to get well.  Now they are also used at weddings, decor, ect...but there is a sweet story of a little girl who was sick and made them (one story says she finished, another said she died and it was finished and then buried with her later...either way she was sick), so it's popular for the Japanese to make these paper prayers whenever there is somone they love that is sick and they are pretty much helpless to help. 

So all week long Akira and I have been working on them, and it's taking forever!  But it's a great gift. 

In other news we are going to Vegas for the weekend for a wedding.  I hate Vegas.  It is by far the trashest place in the USA.  I hate it hate it hate it.  It's over priced and wayyyyyyyyyyyy over rated.  The clubs suck, the gambling sucks, the rooms suck.  I mean, LA beats Vegas any day in everyway.  But I hate the people there the most.  They seem to be hicks from all corners of the world who come out for a week and pretend to be rich when clearly they aren't if they gasp at a $15 cocktail.  They party like slobs and become a sea of vomit smelling perverts. 

Clearly I'm going for the wedding and coming right back.

Almost thought about using Dad's new plane...but I doubt Dad will let his precious out of his sight.  Too bad, I'd really like to take Akira up.

So...yes...still having issues getting laid due to the pets being so needy.  So the up side to Vegas is that I can finally lock Akira in and give him some proper lovin'. 

I need to pay more attention to Akira I think.  I've been so busy with the animals and trying to set everything up that I feel like I'm neglecting Akira.  So when he comes home today I'll give him a bath and feed him some rich Persian food.

He's such a good man.  I feel like I'm surround with adorable faces whenever I come home <3. 

Well....we got a cat...that I swear looks and acts just like a boy Luna.

So...we have a tiny dog and a tiny cat...that makes our apartment...seem tiny...hahaha, but very active.

Akira is on cloud nine.  He is soooooooooooo happy.

It's nice that anytime I need to change his mood, I just dangle something cute in front of him.  It's so funny cause everytime I do it I laugh and make fun of how Japanese he is...all in good fun though.

Our sex life has gone down a bit due to the bed sharing with the animals...so I moved the cat (Ramen...cause it's also the name of a Persian King and means joyful in farsi...and Akira thinks the name is extremely entertaining because we both say it with different accents) out of the bedroom, but Buddy is just too much of a crier to do that, plus he sleeps all night on top of our pillows...so...I just keep him out til the deed is done and then bring him back in...

The cat though....attacks.  So...he won't be sleeping in our room until he learns to behave while we are misbehaving.

Anyhow, we went most of the weekend without it, so I jumped Akira this morning after failing to seduce him last night because he was in the cute trace of the cat and the catnip bubbles he was blowing for the cat to pop.

I have to figure out a way to solve this problem...

Rely for Life was okay, I got sand in my eyes, so I was literally blind all night long, so Akira walked me around the track a few times until we finally my eyes finally were able to open because the puffiness went down.

It freaked me out some...but my eyes are so grasshopper like, that I felt stupid for not preparing for sand to get in them.  Last year I wore sunglasses.  Lesson learned.  Stacy, the sweet blond, was amazing as always, she was team captin and was pretty adorable the entire time.  I still can't believe Akira never went for her, if I were a man, I'd marry her.  LOL!  She's just soooooooooo happy and soooo sweet that you can't help for adore her. 

Other than that, this weekend was full of vet visits and saving Ramen at the shelter (we got him half off because he was about to take the long walk...so I love him...I'm so happy we got him.)  Buddy, our yorkipoo...thinks Ramen is the greatest toy we ever got him...though Ramen has finally made it clear that he isn't a toy and this resulted in Buddy actually crying about it in our room.  It feels like I'm a mom to some degree but they do make the home more loving.  They are both very sweet, and I have to admit, when I have Akira, Buddy and Ramen all snuggled up to me, I feel pretty damn happy.

They have seperation anxity though...looooool.  Ramen even hops in the shower with me dispite his hate towards water, he'll suck it up and meow as I rush to get out.  LOL!!! All three of them, they just hop in the shower whenever I'm in there.  I haven't had the chance to take a bath in two weeks.  I'm going to try to sneak one in tonight.

But I'm really happy.  Cuteness everything.  Thank you God.

And it's Ramadan!!!! 

 

Being the lady to a Japanese Salaryman...ladies, let's talk

I see my world black and white when it comes to relationships....but with Salarymen...there are events that take a bit of time to manage...

Let me tell you a little about work/social life of a man in a Japanese company.

It's not what it really is...it's what you want people to think it is...

I put down lady because it doesn't matter if you're his wife, girlfriend, or mother....whatever your title is...if you're the main lady in a Japanese Salaryman's life...your life takes on a double form...with the main focus being...when the fuck is he coming home.

Akira works for the Zensho company...and in all honesty...the more and more I'm around them, and the more and more I read about the company itself...it's not really a bad place.  It's a very stressful place...but...they focus on two things...fast and simple.  Here's some info for those interested   http://www.forbes.com/global/2011/0117/companies-japan-zensho-beef-bowl-extremely-fast-food.html?feed=rss_asia

Fast...for a Japanese company I think Zensho is extremely quick in response and action.  Of course, I really don't have anything to compare it to, my father worked at the HQ for Toyota...and he always complained about how slow everything was...and that the on going meetings were pointless, but while Akira does attend some extremely long meetings...usually back to back...I have to say...they do get shit done.  Akira is a project manager...mainly because he's perfect for it.  He's completely fluent in both English and Japanese...as well as completely emerged in both cultures.  He's fast and extremely bright.  His problem solving is always done in a very calm way, and in a very logical and simple way...something that he does constantly at work or at home, that I personally rely on.  Anytime we fight...it's because I didn't list what was bothering me.  If I list what I'm mad about and give it to him....a few hours later I get a very polite and detailed email on possible solutions, along with flowers or dinner....or both...sometimes a gift.  Either way...anytime we do fight...it's because we didn't list our issues.  We even have little word magnets and a magnet dry-earse board on our fridge to avoid face to face verable fights...mainly because I start crying and nothing gets solved and mainly because we end up pissing each other off. 

Anyhooooooow, he's perfect for the job.  There isn't a person who will say otherwise if you've worked with him.  No one can do what he does and completely understand it.  His half life upbringing paid off.  But...if you're with a salaryman....you're always waiting.

14-16 hours a day is normal.  I don't even blink anymore when he goes past 12 hours...I know he's got another 4 or so to go.   During the week...his life is dedicated to Zensho.  Nothing I can say or do can distract him from this matter...and...it can cause a number of fights.  A lot of salarymen have two lives.  Home life where they seem...well..harmless...and...Work life...where they work constantly, but also...have pervy meetings at hostess clubs, strip clubs, bars to gock at women, even the nice blonde girl almost filed a sexual harrassment suit on just about every Japanese man working here at the American branch because they are just retarded.  I blame that on peer pressure.  Get a group of Japanese men, and it's a dick contest on who has the biggest balls and who has the hottest mistress.   You think I'm lying...I'm not.  You think your man isn't part of that?  Don't be stupid.  I keep an extremely close eye on Akira.  There was a good three months where we almost broke up because I would have screaming fist fights with him over taking visiting Japanese business men to strip clubs while their wives waited bored at the hotel room.  One of these men was Akira's boss for a very short time and even took me to dinner and told Akira to leave me!!!! And Akira almost did it...but then he saw everyone's reaction to the Japanese business men.  He works mainly with a lot of American women, and I can tell you, all the girls look at them with discuss...not because of their work eithics, but because they are perverts.  And well...I was getting emails from his coworkers giving me updates on Akira...as well as Akira allows me to track his phone...so...we worked it out...and now Akira stands up against it.  Not because of me, but because he does see where being a pervert is morally wrong.  Trust me, it took me a lot to show him the dark side of the sex industry, and it took the blonde telling him off and defending me to show him what the other J-salarymen were doing was wrong and extremely offensive.  Anyhow, the yong guys are usually the senior employees' bitch....so peer pressure is hard to confront.

I get worried when we move to Japan, but it helps that I know he will be teaching.  Teaching is less risky I think.  You can't be a pervert in front of children...at least not without criminal charges. 

But that is EVERY SALARYMAN.  I have yet to meet anyone different, and with the Japanese you know they all mimick each other, so even if it's "peer pressure" it's still sick and wrong.  With that said...if the bosses are more family orinated or actually loves their wife...then these pervy moments will just be limited to harrassing coworkers.  It's sad, but it's true.  Akira is a bit socially outcasted from the Japanese businessmen because he's so American (which is because I threw a fit in front of a visiting business man whenever he tried to con Akira into taking him to a strip club, I basically told the guy that he was a fucking sicko, and a horrible husband and that I hope his wife will leave him and that if he wanted to stare at American girls Akira could take him to a bar and he could grow some balls and try to talk one into getting naked instead of paying a slave who would be disgusted with him.)...so I'm lucky in the respect that that ordeal went all the way back to Japan and now no one tries to mess with our relationship because I will fucking cut off balls.  ^_^

And don't forget, hostess bars are NOT sex free...legally they state they are, but it's like strip clubs, the money is in hooking, not drinking and flirting.  Against, I've yet to meet a hostess that wasn't a hooker and actually...they all stated their biggest clients are companies...not indiviuals.

In fact one of the main guys in the company came to visit a few months later and during a meeting (not a formal one, they were doing something in the test kitchen) and showed everyone Akira-san's picture of his beautiful American girl.  Well played...still pissed off though.  So...I'm no longer invited to male only dinners.  I use to be though...until I made it clear I wasn't a toy or an idiot. 

And that's the challenge ladies.  I know some of you are brainwashed by dorky anime or jpop or whatever threw you into this world...but take it from a girl who has abosolutely no touch of yellow fever or an dying admiration towards the Japanese culture, in fact before Akira I never had any desire to even go to Japan and my best girl friends are Japanese (it's just too weird for me, the dress code alone ....these men are more show then action...and what little action is usually done with a wallet and we hope a condom.  I know that's very bleek...and maybe a bit unfair because it's so unflattering....but...they are very successful usually and responsible...I guess...

But most companies have open tabs for their male employees at strip clubs or hostess bars...so don't think controlling their personal wallet has any effect on their work life.  That's another plus though, Japanese companies cater very well to employees.  Akira has a $2,000 living expense for rent or house payment....a car with everything including gas paid for, an iPhone 4gs, paid for with internaitonal calling, health care, life insurance, stock, their version of a 401k, ect...down to tabs at certain locations with codes given to certain employeess who have "earned" it.  That's the corp world for them I guess. 

A lot of pluses though, and if you get the man to actually love you, then you have nothing to worry about, in fact usually the wives have their own little group, which I'm slightly part of, but usually seen as a little sister or a kid playing house...but...

I love Akira and he loves me, and when it comes down to it, it's based on honesty and trust.  And that's why we fight usually away from each other, because we do piss each other off, and we do tell each other about it, and we do fight about it...but...that honesty is what keeps me around apart from being in love.  Because I've been in love with out trust.  It's a very unhealthy way to live and it literally made me so stressed my hair was falling out, but...with Akira...I trust him.  He loves me so much and is so proud of me, he even calls me his unicorn as cheesy as that is...

So I wait for him.  I cook dinner at 8pm-2am, depending when he gets home, and I wake up and get him ready for work.  I place his favorite sweets in his briefcase or text him saucy messages while he's at work.   I do my part to ensure a connection during the week...because men are like plants.  They constant water and sunlight or they die.  So I water him during the day and I sunlight him at night ;-). 

So it's nothing like the fucking cartoons or music videos.  It's real life, so...if you're obessed and day dreaming about Japanese men...it's time to grow up.  Men are men....and that usually means that there is a strong gene no matter the race, on being a pervy ass.

So...good luck.  Love is worth it, just make sure he loves you back and that you're not forgiving him for "culture" things that are just truly unmoral things.  Stand your ground and stand by him if he's worth it.

In the Norm

So...my goal of late...is to do two things...keep my horns of jealousy in check...and to find a way to have a deeper rooted connection to the SD area by finding couples to chill out with....something that will make both of us more comfortable and happier then us doing stuff on our own.  We're pretty much attacted to each other, anytime we have days off alone, it feels empty.  So...

I'm hoping this will help...

This past weekend we made up, unpacked the apartment, brought in our yorkie-poo puppy, Buddy, and next weekend we'll have our kitten Ramen...(cause it's also a Persian name, lol) and then we went with my little brother and his gf to Knotts Berry Farm for some roller coaster fun!

It was a productive weekend...not as good as it would have been to go on a trip...and now Akira's weekends are used up...so I don't know when we'll go away again...but...

At least we got some cute pics! The blonde is my brother's girl friend and a great person might I also add :-D. 

This little guy is Buddy :-)

Nothing to bring back from Japan??? Nope...it's all here.

The Japanese population in California is growing, about 20% are Japanese (they out populate the Chinese migrates actually), with 13% of that being in the States less then ten years. 

As a result....we have many many dining opitions...Akira rarely misses Japanese food or shopping....or bars...or companies...because they all have branches here.  Makes sense.  This state is known for technology...and well...it's just natural that Japanese companies come here.  Across from my office for instance are the following companies....Sony, Toshiba, Hitichi, Panasonic, Toyota headquaters in the States, Mazda headquaters in the States...and that's just in a few blocks from each other. California has a ton of hot springs, moutains, on the ocean (with constant earthquakes), with the mountain areas having four seasons and it's just very similar...though not the same.  It's not humid here at all, it's very dry in fact...but, I enjoy the break from humidity because 20 years on the Gulf of Mexico in southeast Alabama...with nonstop rain in the late summer and 99% humdity...along with yearly hurricanes and flooding.   I have enjoyed the break.  I miss the smell though... 

Anyhow, as a result, there are areas in California that are so Japanese that no one speaks fluent English.  20 min south of our home, there is such an area, and ironically...it's also has a Persian area.  Akira and I always enjoy beebopping in these areas...

You want a tatami dining room complete with a remote control heated kotatsu?  (like we just started to put together) No problem, just go to your local Japanese market (because they are EVERYWHERE) and order one, while enjoying a tea full of boba (thanks China) and/or mochi treat (I know I look like a fat ass in the market, but I'm a bride to be, so I starve myself daily unless I'm out shopping) ....and usually some back and forth bragging on prices and time set ups.   Akira and I make a pretty damn good team when it comes to bragins.  Two weeks ago we got our engagement pictures half off on top of our coupon because...well...no one expected us to just look at the prints and leave, but that's what we did... ^_~

I'll scan them in later and put them on here, they are pretty cute....ANYWAY...

I'm scared about the soon coming visit and move, but I'm pretty damn happy that I won't be going in completely moronic and stupid.  My j-girls though...since they got mad at me that I wasn't going to go all out with a wedding...have kind of been silent the past few weeks.  I got invited to a kimono fashion show (again within a few blocks from work) but I'm going to be tree camping...so...

Another weird thing is that we have nothing to BRING BACK from Japan, because it's all here.  It truly is all here.  I am, however, bringing a box of shoes and make up to leave there...looool...I'll have Akira hide it in his room because I'm sure his mom would consider that very rude of me to assume she would be okay storing her unwanted new daughter-in-law's make up and shoes.  *sigh* 

Life just keeps getting more and more....entertaining...to put it softly.

Summer time PLEASE!

So life has kind of gotten into a nice and normal routine again....

Vistors came and went...

Court came and destroyed my bank account, but now that's almost recovered...

The move happened...

Engagedment was announced....

Trip planned, and replanned...but back on again...

So...Akira and I have decided that the only way to properly celebrate is going to Elk, CA and go TREE CAMPING THIS WEEKEND...followed by hot springs and fishing at our favorite lake...

*sigh*

Baby gave me back my summer <3 .  Out in the middle of nowhere (hopefully with my new telescope if it comes in on time!!!), in the water, sleeping dangling from a tree...with nothing to hold on to but him.

You know I'll make that tent swing!  Yeah baby!!!  ;-)

Move is complete and trip is back on

So Akira's boss gave Akira the ok for both the move into our beautiful new home and the time needed at the end of sept to go to Japan. My brother however left the business so now I can't do my cram course because I'm the only manager right now so.... That's a little of a set back but okay.


Everything is okay... Lol... Just keeping calm and carrying on ;-)

Akira debating to go into storage or not lol I love him <3

nickle knees

I miss my girls.... :-(  I'm the one in the bad choice pink. 

So I don't know what to write about only that I'm sure I'll feel some kind of relief after I'm done writing.

I don't have any real close girl friends anymore...now that I'm engaged and living with Akira.  It's largely due to the fact that I don't desire to go to clubs anymore, or to gossip about who's hot and who's not.  On top of that...I'm also the last girl any of the girls expected to get married off.  In fact, almost every day I get at least one of the girls asking me if I'm sure I want to marry Akira, that there are other men.

And I always say the same thing, I know there are other men, but there's only one man like Akira.

Sure...I get annoyed by his aloofness...his wondering eye gets to me too...but...that's really it.

Two things...out of the hundreds of things I down right love about him, and not a single thing I hate.  He stopped the strip clubs, the constant ex contacts...he's done a lot for me.  So...I don't have the desire to go dance in a crowded club with some stranger's hard on rubbing up on me.

I just don't find that fun anymore.

Now camping, or beaching it, or having dinner...I'm down.  I still go to dressed up lounges and poetic hookah cafes....but...I flash my ring proudly. 

I also think another thing that gets to them is that when we do go out I get the attention now....it hasn't always been like that, or if it was, I never noticed it....but I think because I have the relief of not being out there anymore...I'm just 100% myself.  I joke, I laugh, I'm not constantly fiddling with hair and make up, because...I got mine.  I can act like I was in my pjs with a can of frosting...when I'm really in heels and a dress and cuddling a drink...but you know what I mean.  I feel free.  And it's because of Akira. 

So...I don't ever want to leave someone who makes me feel more like myself then I could ever do on my own.  He's built me up. 

So...now I'm more into....just solely female get togethers.  Which, since most of my female friends are sex crazed...isn't ideal and therefore I'm boring now.  I'm boring Tiffy.  Still funny...but now not really needed. 

So I feel weird.  I don't know how to act with them, and I'm not the oldest one in the group, a few other girls are even ten years older, but...everyone...just can't swallow that I'm going to be married.  It makes me feel bad....I know I was a massive socialite at one time...but...then I just became a loser who was drunk all the time.  You would think everyone would be happy over the progress instead. 

I do have a few girls that are more like sisters...but everyone is so far away now...*sigh*  The one girl who is near me (down the road actually) is included in the sex crazed and partier group.  I just want to get my nails done and drink at the beach at night and laugh with a few good girls. 

And not worry about them calling over some guy or leaving for a few hours :-/

Yes....no

Sooooo last Friday Akira got a phone call from his parents in Japan. The convo went along the lines of forced light hearted teasing to the serious topic of change of dates of the family gathering. The dates changed one month earlier then expected, leaving Akira unable to go because he already had planned for October by planning his project for work allowing him time to leave. The new dates clash with when he has to do a second opening... So Friday he threw a silent fit with a cuss word thrown here and there.

Not that I have a preferred way people should express anger but with Akira I can never tell what is really bothering him. I even held back my own tears whenever he told me his father requested just the five of them attend (excluding me) and that the October visit was no longer needed. Akira looked at me and held my hand as he was telling me this and told me he couldn't go in sept but that we will be going in October.

So.....these r times when I really need to be fluent in Japanese because I know there r things missing in this ordeal.

Now I'm beyond horrified at moving to Japan. :-(